Hump day

Now there's a phenomenon to rival HNT if ever there was one. I should have had a crap day. Wednesday's suck, they always have for me. Too far removed from the weekend either side. They are the day where I won't hold the lift even though i can hear shoes tapping on the tiles towards the closing door. Or I'll see a couple being all kissy across the lights from me, and grimace. Or I'll see a girl with long, silky straight hair and want to yank it out.

But I was so damn productive today. I am training one of the newbies. The piles on my desk seem to be shrinking. I had a nice long lunch with someone who thinks I'm great. I bought fruit, including avocados that were only $2 each. I went to tae bo at the uni gym after work and the instructor was smoking hot. I washed my hair. And I have a really great, really sad book to go to bed with when I get off this keyboard.

But I shouldn't be feeling this equalized. By early afternoon I was feeling bloated and nauseous and had lower back pain. But I'm like the anti-PMS lady, I just felt so well aligned today, that I kind of revelled in mother nature's warning signs. Except maybe the obligatory zit I seem to get on my chin, Mt Vesuvius mum used to call them, much to my chagrin. I haven't been on the pill since mum got sick for the second time, so I've been self-regulating for coming up three years. Which is fine cause I haven't had a whole lot of sex in that time. Good gawd that's a loooooong time.

Anyway, I didn't go and get all organic on it completely because of the cancer, but I remember being in the hospital, and the oncology registrar noticing that both mum and I have these strange little pink dots, the size of pin pricks, on our hands, that mum used to call hormones, that flare up when our body is doing womanly type stuff, and the registrar was really interested in these dots, and I just got this knot in my stomach because of her interest which has never completely relaxed. Like my little pink dots are a time bomb. Which is bullshit, reason would dictate. But fears are often unreasonable. And so I just don't like the pill.

That was sufficiently morbid enough to make me feel like I need to reclaim the balance, yin/yang, good feng shui cloud I was on before I conclude this post. Oooh, I know.


Yes, that's very nice.